Sunday, March 1, 2015

Grandmas Are Truly Special

This is an emotional week for me. My paternal grandmother, Ella Mae McGill, has been gone for 21 years today. Tomorrow is my brother's birthday and he would be 32 if he were living. Friday, my maternal grandmother, Myrtle Lanier, will be gone 11 years.

Grandmothers are known by many names: grandma, maw maw, mee-maw, mam-maw, nana, and even Big Mama. They are that balancing, equalizing force in our lives. They raised or help raise us in many ways. They have that old school, no nonsense manner regarding life. These special women taught us much during this time, and often let you get away with stuff and spoil you like your parents wouldn't.

I didn't get the opportunity to know my Grandma McGill as well as I would like. I do remember her as being a calm, caring, loving woman. She loved to cook pound cake , and her recipe is still a staple at family dinners. She raised eight children by herself back in the 50s and 60s in the height of racism and when welfare was basically unheard of. Grandma Ellie Mae was long the family matriarch, like Big Mama from Soul Food. She worked hard virtually her whole life, and was last a custodian at Clover Middle School. Nearly everyone says I inherited her smile and kind spirit.

My grandma Myrtle "Maw"Lanier helped raise me as my mom was in the single mother role herself. Maw had spent a lifetime raising and teaching. She not only reared her two children, she helped raised her siblings as she was the oldest of twelve,  and then later on her own grandchildren and great-grands. Maw also was a hard worker, spending years in the textile industry, doing income taxes part-time, and even returning to school for her GED and studying law before she became disabled. She taught us many things: how to cook, clean, about the Lord and church, how to drive, and how to make your voice heard. Maw was a tough, loving woman that didn't back down from anyone. That trait, among many, was passed down to me.

Watching these two great women have helped shape the man I am today. I often light up when someone mentions either one of their names. I am proud to be Myrtle and Ella Mae's grandson or grandbaby. It truly is an honor.

If your grandma is living, I hope you all cherish the relationship you have with them. These memories and times will last long after they depart.

How close are you to your grandmothers? Do you miss your grandma very much? What did she/they mean to you?

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