Sunday, October 23, 2016

Can't Hardly Wait, For Much Anymore

We're in a society of instant gratification. Many wait all year for Christmas and shop and decorate as soon as possible. We will say we don't have spare time but will spend an entire day binge watching Luke Cage. Also, we will vote as early as possible to ensure Trump or Hillary won't win.

We also have DVRs and advanced technology so how did we get here?

I believe many folks are in competition with each other and want to be the first to do or see something. They hate getting left behind.

This mentality has effected both Apple and Samsung folks. The iPhone 7 appears to be the phone of the year in sales, but many are adjusting to having to buy cordless earphones and speakers. Meanwhile, the Note 7 has had more problems, the latest being explosive batteries. I tell folks often to wait when it comes to technology but they won't.

Patience is still a virtue but many won't embrace it. They prefer short term gratification over long term happiness. Also, they need to realize what they want, not others.

Use wisdom and patience in your life and be your own person. The Joneses will be fine, trust me!

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Black Or White: Caught In The Middle!

OK it seems racial tensions are at an all time high as we enter yet another presidential election. It seems overall, neither blacks nor whites as a whole understand each other. Some, however, would like to. You can tell by remarks on either end that many actually wanna get along and not return this country to the 60s, which is where it's headed.

Here are some basics to understand about both races. Being half black, half white, I had to learn more. But I will help both sides where I can.

Black people , especially black women, are targets everyday and not just by the police and media. They feel hurt and betrayed just as their ancestors did when they feel slighted or profiled based on their skin color. They don't agree with everything the Democratic party says and does, but feels like they look out for minorities more than the GOP does. Being black is a blessing and a curse but not many ethnicities would swap places. They will do "black" things and have black friends but aren't about living the life 24/7.

White people are blind to many obvious truths out there. This is called white privilege. I don't blame them fully for this, they simply haven't been in a position where they had to learn or understand other races. Whites are killed in higher numbers than blacks and get persecuted as well. However, history and privilege restrain them from being as aggressive about it as black people. They see the #blacklivesmatter movement as racist and offensive because they don't fully understand the overall significance. It's ok to like and believe what you do. However lack of understanding and communication can be dangerous for both races. Again you have to feel this pain, and not assume that everyone is a racist. Whites have to show others they want to understand and help and that wrong is wrong.

We are all humans at day's end with lots of cultural differences. Again speak your mind all day but do so with understanding and reason.

Until next time, ...

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Saving Paid and Unpaid Time At Your Job

Many of you know I have worked for 21 years of  my adult life, around 17 of those with paid and unpaid time available.  I have become adept at managing both , especially in emergencies and such. The basic available types of time are vacation time, personal time, (or PTO), and unpaid time (also known as chargeable time or comp time).

Proper management of this time can lead to greater peace of mind.  For example, many doctors recommend at least one week/year off from working. If you accumulate this time (40 hours for many folks), you have your week easily. 

Here are some tips to maximize your time as we end one year and begin the next.

1. Always know your available balance of time

Check your time at least twice/week.  Failure to do so could result in you using time you thought you had, and having to fight to keep your job.

2. Plan out the year the best you can.

At the beginning of the year, plan which dates you will need off , and the necessary time. Many companies go by first come, first come, then tenure.

3. Save extra for the unforseen.

Time from work is like money in the bank. Regardless of how it's spent, it shouldn't be in one place. Use your time that doesn't roll over but spread it out.

4. Know which time rolls over and what time you can take with you.

Save more of the time that expires, and especially what you have in larger balances. This can be a game changer, and then you can also plan more efficiently.

5 . Go home, if you can afford it. 

Many companies allow unpaid days and furloughs where your regular time isn't affected at all. Use these wisely also and remember you still must eat and pay bills.

Saving time really isn't advanced physics, just takes simple budgeting and planning. Also, communicate with management and HR regularly about when you want to take off and your available balance. Trust me, you don't want the clock running out

Sunday, October 2, 2016

Why I'm Not Currently Married Or Even Dating

I'm sitting back, fresh off of my 20 year class reunion. It was a very good time but given where you come from (and for me, these choice questions tend to arise at times).

Why aren't you married?
Why don't you have any kids?
You're too good of a guy to not have someone?
Where's your woman?

Sometimes I can tolerate this, except when folks become relentless. Then I have to check them and inform them of my quick reasoning. After that, I believe their curiosity turns into disrespect for what I want and my core values.

I read my friend and relationship/life coach's Troy Spry's book earlier this year "Teach Me How To Love 2". One of the biggest takeaways I got was that people aren't in touch with their core values and thus will settle quickly. I don't want that to be me, even I'm still single at my 30th high school reunion.

OK for all those that like to pry into my personal life (which is personal for a reason) at gatherings, seeing me out, social media, etc, here's something for you to read: some reasons why I am not married nor attached right now.

1. I simply haven't found the woman I can see spending the rest of my life with. I do hang out and go on dates and such, but at my age, I know what I want and will not settle. It's not being picky, it's knowing what I want and will tolerate.

2. Relationships nor marriages, especially marriages, are NOT to be rushed into. The divorce rate is high for good reason. Regardless of your age, one should take their time and chill when it comes to romantic affairs. It will happen if and when it's supposed to.

3. I would like for my own mother to see me married and have children. However, since I am a male, I am afforded the luxury of not having a biological clock. This means I can reproduce well on into my elderly years if I choose.  Look at Abraham from the Bible, Jerry Seinfeld, David Letterman, the list goes on. I'm a late bloomer at a lot of traditional things. It's not when but how well you do something.

4. I say this often, everyone is not meant to be married or even attached. I do respect the sanctity of marriages, love and relationships. However you must remember, everything is not for everyone and this includes love. Let us not forget Paul in the Bible.

5. I really, truly enjoy being single. I wrote a piece on it last year, and even participated in a non marital challenge on Facebook last month. One must love, enjoy and value themselves before they can give their heart to another person. Relationships are great with the right person, but single life has a lot of upsides as well. Therefore to those that wish they were single, please stop trying to drag me down.

6. Marriage and children are way more expensive than years ago. The wedding, home, taxes, cost of just one child from six weeks old to 18 years old (that's not including post secondary education.).  Even with a nice two income couple, all of this does cost. People can say you shouldn't worry about all of that and in a way I do agree. However, it's all about timing and I don't need too many bills rushing on me like an avalanche.

7. Lastly, why is it because I am a certain race, look a certain way, have a certain education, etc, etc mean I have to be with someone? Did someone rewrite the rules of society without telling me? Ok how about allowing me to be happy and great, okay? We are in a society where we are too judgmental and are trying to force feed beliefs on this culture and that culture. Let's think for ourselves and live the best lives we can live.

Ok here it is. Now are there any further questions? I really want to put this subject to bed or I will become even more selective about which folks I entertain.

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

We Can All Do Better

We are at a definite crossroads as a country. Black people are mad at the police for continued brutality. White people want the good police to be respected. Me, I'm just like "can't we all admit our faults and come to some common ground."

The thing is folks, we can blame several things: the media, our lackluster presidential candidates, the police, etc for these woes. But as Michael Jackson sang in "Man In the Mirror" we have to look within ourselves if we want true change. We cannot wait around nor be violent and militant to achieve this goal.

Here are some ways in which we can all improve, including myself, and make this world a better place. America isn't know for having the greatest history so we can make it a better future.

1. Hold law enforcement more accountable for their actions and not allow them to be so reactive.
2. Ensure that victims still respect the laws, approach police properly, and handle altercations in court.
3. Register to VOTE and actually VOTE!
4. Don't be blind to any obvious truths. I, like many others, am tired of this mess. However I am still conscious of the major issue here.
5. Research your thoughts and opinions carefully before spouting off on social media. Google and Snopes <insert topic> are great for this.
6. If we're gonna boycott anything, boycott ALL media. They are the ones making this whole ordeal into a sideshow. The media loves its ratings and like a scripted reality show, many are playing right into the main plot.
7. As I said before, violence begats violence. In this matters, fight with your head and NOT your weapons.
8. Try hard to see the other side's point of view. We cannot reach a common ground and that is one of the main problems here. Misunderstanding and miscommunication can be deadly, literally.
9. Don't be just a passive social media activist for either side. Take proactive action in the movement you support the most.
10. Don't judge others or force your beliefs on them. Try and respect them and again, come to some understanding.

Please let's get our country back. China and Russia do not need another leg up on the USA. We have let the media turn a major battle into a sixth grade playground scuffle. Yeah you're drawing a crowd and attention. But how effective is it really?

We ALL need to do better, period

Tuesday, September 20, 2016

Some benefits of going to the chiropractor

Yes ladies and gentlemen! In a word where racism is still strong and the government and media have too much control over us all (I know they're reading), there are still those that defy the power of the chiropractor as a legitimate healing doctor.

Despite awesome customer reviews, results and overall good reputations from chiro offices, many are still seen as quacks and glorified massage therapists. Even during my research, I had to really dig for facts to support my claim because folks are writing and posting about most of the negative press from chiropractors.

Well as a loyal customer of chiropractors, myself and my mother, I'm gonna offer some well researched and tested benefits for seeing a chiro.

1. Yes many already get weekly to bi-weekly massages.  Why not take it a step further and get a spinal adjustment? Do the knowledge, it's basically a massage times five.

2. I have watched the health benefits over the years: less headaches, straighter spines, and avoiding expensive and risky surgeries and medications. Yes I am aware of the risks and malpractice lawsuits out there against the discipline. But how is addiction to painkillers and surgery that could possibly ruin your life even better?

3. Remember this is holistic healing. Chiropractors are trained to do a lot of things, but they are specialists. Do not confuse them for your family doctor or even healing in places other than the neck and back. Holistic healing is some of the best, and has been practiced for centuries.

4. Many insurance companies now work with chiropractors. Doesn't sound too risky if some of the big names such as Blue Cross Blue Shield and Cigna are cosigning for chiros.

5. Benjamin Franklin once said everything in moderation. This includes the chiropractor. People love the feeling afterwards, and want to continue going back. Don't overdo it, and continue to practice safe measures to keep yourself out of any doctor's office.

6. Finally, chiropractors overall have some of the highest customer ratings out of any medical specialists.

So before you slam an entire profession because certain ones that can pop backs claim to be chiros, do your research please. I did, the good and the bad. Based on what I've seen, you're much better off going then relying on pills and surgery in many cases.

Or you could end up like Quasimodo

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Fun With Flags, Or Not?

OK today is the 15th anniversary of 9/11. On this day, we honor the flag, and those who fight to protect it.

This has been very controversial since San Francisco 49er quarterback Colin Kaepernick sat during the National Anthem for the first three games and kneeled during the 4th. He claimed he was not disrespecting the military or even the country, he was making a stand against a country that allows blatant police brutality to run rampant.

Now here are my thoughts. I have said in the past there needs to be a celebrity or someone with star power to stand up for this cause. Kaep definitely got the attention of the nation and he didn't physically hurt anyone in the process. He fully exercised his First Amendment rights. Personally, I wouldn't have been brave enough to stand against the flag like that but Colin is at the point in his career where he can do this without major consequence. Now many people, celebrities and non, have researched the history of the American Flag and the National Anthem and are refusing to stand.

Also, perhaps it's good the 49ers don't play their season opener until tomorrow.

Now we have the Confederate Flag, which has a deep history, but has caused a greater deal of harm.  It reappeared in the national media summer of 2015 when a young Caucasian man from Charleston shot up a black church, killing nine innocent people. Governor Nikki Haley then decided to finally remove the flag from atop the state house, a move she had previously refuted.

Now here are my views regarding the Confederate Flag. I honestly don't believe it was created as a hate flag, although it has become that. It was the South's Civil War flag of course, and they ended up losing the battle on slavery and the war. It seems our country are still stuck on both topics of this war. The Confederate Flag isn't the American Flag, it has too much negative connotation and symbolism behind it, and it is bad for overall business in the South. Not everyone that flies it is racist, but seemingly all racists and white power groups have it. There are other ways for proud Southerners to show their heritage. That being said, I don't judge everyone for flying this flag, just the ones that keep fighting a 150 year old war.

Well this is my edition of Fun With Flags. I don't get into political or racial stuff often but I feel it was warranted this time.