Seven Online Dating Tips To Ease The Tension

Online dating was once considered taboo and only for the lonely and desperate. Many adults of all walks of life, from corporate professionals to schoolteachers and even factory workers now date on cyberspace. They try pay sites such as eHarmony and Match, and even experiment with free sites such as PlentyofFish.

I've participated in online dating myself and have had success, even forming two relationships based on Internet encounters. Here are seven tips for those that are new to the scene, or want to improve their odds.

1. Call and text this person for at least two weeks prior to meeting them.

This is not much different from traditional dating or courting. Only you have yet to meet this person yet. Listen to what they have to say, keep your standards intact, and see if they are the person they portray in their online profile. For example, they may claim to have a Ph.D. Now if they are cursing every breath, can't form a coherent sentence, and use a lot of slang, that may be a red flag. The intent here is honestly to see if you can have a good conversation with them. Dead silence and one-word text messages are neither good nor indicative of chemistry.

2.  Find a degree of separation between the two of you (mutual friend, connection, town, school, etc)

This can facilitate the process and weed out any pretenders. It is especially important if both of you have a common friend or acquaintance. You have a third party involved that can give you honest insight into what this person is really like. This way, if they have a sudden moodswing or even a dark secret, you're not as suprised.

3. Make sure they have a vast and classy collection of photos in their profile.

Now I'm not at all shallow. However, the person must be attractive on the outside to you if you are ever going to consider dating them. More important, one or two pictures rarely tell the story. You will need a variety, preferably at least one recent full body shot. Most anyone looks good with a head and shoulder shot. However, you should not need to be in shock when you meet them and there is a 50 pound weight differential. Finally, look at how that person is dressed. If all they have on is wife beaters, bathroom poses, and pics of them in scandily clad clothing, you may want to think twice about continuing that relationship. It is about what you want, but you want to make sure this person portrays class and isn't just on the web to cheat on their significant other or use you as bait to be their side date.

4. Google them

Google can be your friend when dating a virtual stranger. There are many research and background tools online, and Google is an awesome place to start. You can even find out where this person works, what they tweeted if their Twitter account is public, or other pertinent and useful information. Google isn't just for women anymore; it's a legitimate research source. Also, its free. Use it to your full advantage.

5. Social networking

I just mentioned Twitter. Also, find out if they're on Facebook, LinkedIn, Google +, or Instagram. This comprises numbers three and four. You get to see their photo gallery, extensive profiles, what their thoughts are, how they express themselves, and you may even come across someone you both know. It has happened to me several times. Many people will not date someone, even online, if they are on social media together. However, for this purpose, it may be very effective. This is especially the case with Skype. You can video chat with a person to get a better view of who this person there. Smartphone apps such as Facetime and Tango have similar benefits.

6. Don't date someone more than two hours away

I would almost even say an hour for Internet dating. At worst, don't go outside your state, or more than one state. Long distance relationships are tough enough. You want to have an ample opportunity to know this person. Make an effort to try folks in the next city, or within close driving distance.

7. Meet them in a public place, and have a friend of yours present

The big day has arrived. You two decide to meet after all of the phone calls, texts, pictures and research. I would suggest doing it in public for safety purposes and during the daytime. The mall is a great place for this meeting to occur. Other great places are uptown, a grocery store, a local festival, or even a crowded park. The meeting is when everything comes together. It is much harder to fake a connection or a vibe in person. Not everyone is capable of accomplishing this, which is why they hide behind the Internet. You can finally get a better idea of who they are, and if you want a second date, just the two of you.

Online dating is really not that scary. Just use common sense and proper judgment.  Happy cyberdating!

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