Metrosexual or Just A Girly Man?

Once upon a time, men were REAL men. They handled their own, took care of home, were strong and protective, and showed little to no emotion. Now in 2012, it seems that is long gone. Many men are so emotional, whiny, and feminine. I blame many factors: lack of a dominant male role model, and pop culture. Drake's whiny lyrics, plus guys wearing skinny jeans have helped to soften up this new crop of men.

Metrosexuality became a craze about nine years ago. Straight men were wearing pink, getting manicures and pedicures, and simply showing a sensitive side. That isn't so bad. It's when they start acting like they are on their period, crying for no reason, and just not properly stepping up to the plate as a man.

Now what should a REAL man do and how much emotion should he show? Well, I have already listed a few traits. Also, this guy must protect, show confidence, and have good rational, aggressive decision making skills. It's fine to show some emotion and even cook, buy feminine products for their ladies, and dress nice. However, balance all of that with controlling and moderating your emotions, being strong physically, mentally and emotionally. Also, show some old school machismo. Don't put down women for being non-traditional, but know your role and play it well. You don't have to be a thug or roughhouse, but stand tall and don't be anyone's doormat. Also, whine less and be more of a man of action.

Real men are simply rocks under pressure, period. Think Clint Eastwood, Burt Reynolds, or even the abrasive Samuel L. Jackson. Women want a man in their lives, not a baby boy they have to raise. A real woman will not do that. They will tell you to go to your mom or dad for that.

So fellas, chill with the excessive crying and whining. It really isn't cool. Women will not always admit it, but they do not want their equal. Stay out of the mirror and dry your eyes. They want to be in control not necessarily of them, but situations. They want you to be able to handle your emotions and theirs.

No one is perfect, but that doesn't mean you should strive to be the best balanced man possible. That certainly doesn't include showing more emotion than masculinality. A healthy, man friendly balance is necessary.

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Gabby, Barack, and Tebow: will people leave them alone already?

The 2012 Olympics in London, England are ending tonight. In a few weeks, the 2012 NFL season opens. Also, we have a presidential election in 2012, where President Barack Obama is vying against Republican Mitt Romney to become only the second Democrat since FDR to win back to back terms.

These 2012 Olympics have had several heroes and great storylines. Obviously one of the biggest stories was 16 year old gymnast Gabby Douglas.  She won three medals in her first Olympics, one of them a team gold with the "Fab Five" gymnastics team that became the first Olympic team to win that event since the Magnificent Seven in the Atlanta 1996 games. She is known worldwide and will return to the USA a multimillionaire and a household name. However, many folks would rather focus on how her hair looked during the events, or on how much debt her mother was in. That doesn't make much sense to me. What does any of that have to do with her abilities, talent and achievements?

President Barack Obama has been undergoing similar criticism since he was first elected four years ago. He is the nation's first Black president, and argubably the most scrutinized politican ever. He hasn't been perfect, as he is admittedly inexperienced. Nevertheless, he is doing an admirable job of cleaning up George W. Bush's eight year mess. He is bringing better healthcare, he helped eliminate Osama Bin Laden, the troops from Iraq and Afghanistan are coming home, and the economy is steadily improving. It seems, like Gabby, critics and haters do not want to give Obama the proper credit for what he has actually done. They want to slander him, and say they have yet to see change. There is a world of positive difference between now and 2008 if one looks carefully. Also, everything bad is not his fault either. He is STILL fixing Bush's mistakes, plus Congress makes the laws, and is refuting many bills he proposes. Folks really need to research all sides of an issue before throwing stones.

NFL quarterback Tim Tebow was the league's biggest story last year with the influence he had on the Denver Broncos, the Christian community, and the nation. He coined the term and the meme "tebowing" and gave folks lots of hope. Now he will get the opportunity to do this with the New York Jets, in a tough media market. People criticized him heavily as well, citing that he was too religious, overrated, a novelty, and that the defense carried him. Like it or not, Tebow has won at all levels of his sports life. He just puts that enthusiasm in a person to make you want to play with him. He has a strong love for the Lord and the game of football. It seems people would rather break down his flaws though.

This hating and negativity must end. Gabby, Obama and Tebow are human beings first. They are influences and role models. But they will err. However, remember they wouldn't be where they are without hard work, determination, and fortitude. There was only one perfect person to ever live, and he was crucified. These extraordinary but imperfect human beings shouldn't be crucified as well. One should not put down folks and make false accusations and rumors just because they don't like that person, or because you want to be that person. Instead, ignore these types of folks, and vote for someone you want to see in office. People were fed up with Bush, so they have given Obama a try. Also, look deep within yourself, realize you are not perfect either, and nurture what you are good at. We are all talented at something, and should strive to be the Gabby, Tebow or Barack at that talent.

We are one nation, one family. The patriotism shouldn't end now that the Olympics have. We need to support each other, love each other, and back each other. Negativity is in overabundance, so let's search for more positivity.

l

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Drug Abuse and Addiction Are Real

Generations ago, it was illegal to even drink at all. This is when prohibition started. Fast forward to now. You have more and more people affected by drug abuse and addiction than ever.
It is more than simply alcohol now. It is crack, prescription pills, Xctasy, and now even bath salts. Certain folks always feel the need to get high and escape to function and cope with life. They feel the need for them like a fish needing water. Of course a fish cannot survive without water. Unfortunately, many folks cannot survive without these drugs, which ironically can end up killing them. At best, your health, wealth, and body are at risk.
Drug addiction is a disease, an evil one, but one that has a cure. It has affected so many people, young and old, and their families and friends. They see this person they once knew as a violent, depressing shell of themselves. They forget not only small, everyday things and tasks; they forget who they really are.  It's truly a tragedy. 
My brother's life was ended early as a result of an accidental drug overdose. Drug abuse is near and dear to my heart not only because I have lost my brother, I have seen other family members destroy their lives as well.
Many celebrities have fallen victim to drugs and died at young ages. These include Frankie Lyman, Michael Jackson, Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Cobain, Chris Farley, John Belushi, Elvis Pressley, Sam Kinison, and Amy Winehouse. Too many people are losing their families, minds and lives for a temporary high.
Healing from a drug addiction is not easy. Rehab can help. There are also counselors, medications to wean one from their drug of choice, and various support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous. However, I've found these such programs work best when that person wants them to work. The addict in question must be ready to make that change.
It is very sad to see a person who knows drugs are horrible and deadly, but cannot shake the habit. These people need your support and love.
There are hotlines and websites to help fight these terrors. Two are The Drug Abuse Hotline, 800-234-8334 and The National Alcohol and Substance Abuse Center, 800-784-6776.
We need to stay educated, at an early age and on throughout life, about the dangers of certain drugs. D.A.R.E. has been active for years in the schools. Our communities must strive together and fight this disease, the same way we fight cancer and paralysis.
Please don't give up this battle. We have stopped too many things as a people, as a nation. Drug abuse can be controlled and eventually curbed. Use your resources, willpower, and make that stand.

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Corporations Can Be Vile and Powerful

Businesses have always intrigued me, even the old lemonade stands children used to have. However, I realized early on there many rules and regulations, often not followed, for a business to be legitimate.

This takes me back to when I was a child watching The Flintstones. Fred and Barney were on the side of the road trying to sell Gravelberry Pies. The police shut them down when they saw them and said they had to have to be licensed to sell pies. Too bad police don't bust more businesses for things like this now.

Businesses and corporations have been under fire for a number of years now. It's been over 10 years since the Enron debacle. Other corporations that are considered evil and vile include Wal-Mart, McDonald's, Microsoft, and even Facebook. Social media has gotten bigger, thereby making Facebook and Mark Zuckerberg more exposed and observed.

On July 11 of this year, (ironically my birthday), Viacom, producer of many television networks such as BET, MTV, VH-1, Spike, TV Land and Nickolodeon, made a brash move. They got greedy and were in discussions with DirecTV to try and charge customers a ridiculous amount to have and view their family of 17 channels. When they couldn't reach an agreement, they pulled their 17 networks on 7/11/12. This spawned an outcry from DirecTV customers and the general public. Viacom has thought to be evil for years for how they have turned channels such as BET and VH-1 into ignorant and buffoon filled programming stations. They tried to exert the power they have on the public onto DirecTV. It didn't work. Less than a week later, Viacom and DirecTV reached a long term agreement. The financial details are still uncertain, but DirecTV has assured its customers that there would be no significant increase to access any station from Viacom.

One would be remissed to leave Chik-Fil-A out of this discussion. They may have been founded on a Christian foundation by Dan Casey and have some of the best customer service you will find anywhere, and tasty chicken sandwiches. However, Casey mixed business with personal by expressing his views on gay marriage. Not only that, it has been reported that Chik-Fil-A has been giving tons of their proceeds to anti-gay organizations for years. This is not as evil and vile as some of the previously mentioned companies. However, if you're a public company , you can get into a ton of trouble if you openly try to exclude a group of people. Discrimination and equal opportunity laws are nothing to play with.

Corporations will do what they can to stay in business. Some will be good, and some will be bad. None will be perfect, however. Just remember that they do hold a lot of power in the food we eat, the clothes we wear, the websites we visit, and the decisions we all make. Therefore, we must choose wisely and have our own minds. Corporations definitely have their own minds, goals, visions, and missions.

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A Football Life: The Love Of The Game

Sports are a major part of our culture and daily lives. Some women even watch as much Sportscenter as some men. ESPN and ESPN2 are required channels on any cable or satellite packages.

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Basketball, baseball, boxing, tennis, golf, hockey, NASCAR, and currently the Olympics have their broad fanbases. However, none beat the nation's #1 sport: football.



It's hard to beat the smell of the freshly cut grass, the taste of the hot dogs and pizza, the roar of the crowds, and the hard hits and big plays. It's pure Heaven to many of us

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Football is like a religion in some areas, and understandably so. It comes on only a few times/week, lasts only a few months, and is simply exciting to watch, but not too exhausting or drawn out as other sports.



My love for football began in my teen years when I played for Blacksburg High School. I still root for the Wildcats. I also attend many high school games around the Carolinas, including Gaffney. No one has to explain to me why football is so big in the city of Gaffney. I attend at least a couple of Gaffney games per year, and have even traveled when they went to the state championship. I love seeing good football and athletes, at all levels of play.



College football is also special. From the tailgating to GameDay on ESPN, it’s an absolute rush. I'm not in favor of the BCS, but I definitely love to watch the drama and excitement of college football. Those players play so hard, in hopes of one day receiving a nice NFL contract. It will be nice when my Notre Dame Fighting Irish can win more often. Beyond that, Saturdays in the fall are made for college football, fight songs, rivalries, and school pride.



The NFL has almost always been great.  It's a great way to cap off the weekend.   My team for the past couple of decades has been the Green Bay Packers. That isn't easy, although they are winning. Most of my family likes America's Team, the Dallas Cowboys. You can only imagine how Thanksgiving is for me since the Boys play every Turkey Day. I still enjoy watching at least five games on Sundays, one on Mondays, and the occasional Thursday night game. The season culminates with the Super Bowl, the highest rated program on television during the entire year.



The NFL became even more exciting for me when I started playing fantasy football about four years ago. I was then forced to pay attention to every player on all 32 NFL rosters. The people I play with do not play for money, simply for bragging rights. My desire, research, and luck paid off last season as I won the championship in one of my leagues. I hope to repeat my championship this season.



Football is a team sport that has united communities of all backgrounds for decades. One can see in many families that the fathers and uncles played, and the mothers and aunts cheered. This tradition continues to be passed down. You even have famous football families such as the Mannings, with Archie, Eli, and Peyton.



There are not enough words to express how happy I am football is back. It is a constant reminder of the good in this world, and the various rewards that can result from a consistent team effort.

Things That Are Said In The South That Are Often Only Understood In The South

It's interesting being a life-long Southerner. Things are more laid back and relaxed down here. Not only is the weather warmer, Southerners are regarded as way more ignorant and backwards than their Northern counterparts. That is not always the case of course. Either way, there are certain things, sayings, words, and way of life that you have to be Southern to know and appreciate.
I started posting these on Facebook and Twitter about a year ago with the help of my mother, some co-workers and relatives. Watching Foghorn Leghorn and listening to Michael Waltrip commentate NASCAR races has helped. Here are a few of these words and sayings.
Fine as frog hair
Smiling like a possum eating grits
Taters, maters, and okree
More nervous than a cat in a room full of rocking chairs
Making more noise than a bunch of skeletons on a hot tin roof
Dagnabit
Livermush sammich
Mud bog
Back or over yonder
Skeered
Whip the tar out of ya
Tarnation
Cute as a button
Chow-chow
Hoppin Johns
French fried taters
Crap and fall back in it
Deer ticks and hash
Tear you a new one
Hot on your heels
Gully washer
Brung
Warsh
Fly off the handle
Bleeding like a stuck pig
Haven't seen ya in a coon's age
Got an ax to grind
Scarce as hen's teeth
Doo-hickey
Fixing to
Spring chicken
White lightning
Tight as dick's hatband
Piddle
Lollygag
Shindig
What in the Sam Hill?
Wast
Sure as shootin'
Didn't stay long enough for the water to get hot
Humdinger
I didn't just fall off the mater truck today Pert near it
Full as a tick
 Smack dab in the middle
Gotta warsh and rinch these dishes
Ain't nerron left
Won't hit a lick of the stick
Tired as all get out.
Madder than a wet hen.

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Dealing With Women In Transition

Dating isn't an easy game, especially with all of the changes women go through. Pregnancy, hormones, emotions, and then other outside factors. Some they can control, some they cannot. Fellas, be gentle and understanding. It's not easy to date a woman, especially when she's in a state of transition. There are a few common types of transitions you may encounter while courting a woman.

1. Career change.

This can also be a time for celebration. If she is promoted, she has more money, more responsibilities at her job, but often less time for you. If she's demoted, has her paycut, or is downsized, she may struggle for a while. This means you may have to carry the load until she gets back on her feet. However, do not do anything for her that she wouldn't do for you. Support her, however, in success and failure. Do not feel threatened if she suddenly makes more money than you. If this is a relationship headed north, that is always a good thing.

2. Weight loss/gain.

Weight loss can be awesome for you. You may have not asked her too, but suddenly she has a new body and a new confidence. Keep the jealously in tact though. More guys will be checking her out. Let that be a compliment to you. If she has gained weight, offer her positive reinforcement. Do not just leave or shun her. She does not need to be reminded that she cannot fit that sexy red jumpsuit you like. That is a slippery slope to walk.

3. Losing a loved one

I have written before about grieving. She may feel down for weeks or months. Make sure you take her out to places she normally likes to go, plan a fun getaway, and go the extra mile. She needs to know you care. Her memory will be clouded during her grieving, but its unlikely she will forget how you treated her in her darkest hour.

4. Moving to a new home and/or city

This is exciting and stressful. She suddenly is in uncharted waters, and doesn't know many people. Show her around if she moved to your city. Help connect her with certain things she enjoyed in her other location. Also, if the move is away from you, talk it over and make the proper arrangements to assure all can work out. You should make a go at it.

5. Newfound faith

She may have found the Lord, or renewed her faith. Her entire lifestyle has now changed. While she can't expect yours too also, remember she may not want to do many of the things you used to do together. Finding a happy medium is key. Remember everything that is fun is not sinful.

6. Coming home from the military

Iraq and Afghanistan veterans can react differently once they're amongst civilians again. Even women in the Reserves and the Guard do not feel the same. Basic training and deployment can give them discipline and loyalty, but make them feel distant. Patience is the key. Also, do not ever feel where you're threatened or in harm's way. Give them time and space also. They need a chance as this is one of the toughest transitions.

7. Going off to school/graduating.

Again, they are either leaving you or returning. Either way, they are more educated, and their mind is typically more open about certain things. Be happy that they have made that move to better themselves and keep a good foundation. Perhaps she can show you some things, or encourage you to return to school. Knowledge is power.

The basic theme in these transitions is patience.  You will see your woman acting, talking, and reacting like never before. Just remember why you like her, why you're with her, and where you want to be with her long term. You must have a strong foundation that can endure any test. You may marry this person someday. Therefore, if you support her in her transitional phases, you are better equipped to support her in the various phases and challenges that a marriage brings.

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