My Ways Of Getting Self Care

Yes this is sort of a retread of a previous blog. I have added some things since, did further research and this is in alignment with the STAR method. 

I block off hours or a certain day or days for this to occur. I plan fun, relaxing outings where I don't think about work, my mother's health, or the other things that can be stressful. 

I also meditate and exercise during any free moment I can. Research indicates one must get a certain amount of intense exercise per week and I do my best to meet this expectation.  

I also spend one entire day making plans for the week: meals, clothes, and outings. This way, my hectic days can flow easier. 

I also take naps and spend my days off getting my sleep and rest. Trust me, it's not easy when you work nights but perhaps I will cover that later on in the future. 

Doing this has helped me to be more happy, productive, and positive.  I cannot forget refreshed. We all need breaks before we break. I hope this helps many of you do so. 

STARS: How To Combat the Flu Without The Shot

Many of you don't want or like taking the flu shot and that's okay.  There are plenty of other ways to prevent the flu from coming your way or fighting it once you already have it. 

I wash my hands thoroughly and I don't shake with just anyone. I am alone aware of who I breathe around, as I am of who I touch. Lysol and Clorox have also been good to me. 

I keep certain medicinal concoctions on me, even fresh fruits and vegetables. I have grown especially fond of white lightning (moonshine) and it is sold commercially in any liquor store around. It is better than any cold medicine out, although I keep Nyquil and others around. I also have local honey, lemons and orange juice.  

Best thing also I have found are rest and fluids like I mentioned above. 

Doing this has only had me congested a handful of times in 7 years and really sick maybe 4 times. I will gladly take those percentages. 

STARS: Avoiding the garder/bouquet at a wedding

I will dive back into my couponing series after I have that huge haul or when I get to shadow a seasonal vet. I saved almost $30 this week and had a decent haul but it wasn't anything life changing or different.  

I will say this before I start my STAR story: make sure you know the stores and cashiers you shop at.  You need to know how to navigate it, obtain what items you need, and even which cashiers will work with you best. Doing that is slowly helping me. 

Ok now on with the story. Many of us have been a part of a wedding in one way or the other. Some of us do not like the bouquet and garter tradition. It puts your singlehood on display and rarely seems to work. I have devised a way to get out of this tired tradition.

I pay attention to what is going on at the reception, especially the order. It is printed on the program sometimes.  But remember if it isn't, it typically happens after the cake cutting (my favorite part btw).  Also, listen for the DJ or whomever is doing announcements to yell for the single men/ladies. 

I saw at the most recent wedding that if all that isn't enough, wait till the bride is seated in front of everyone. That is a dead giveaway of what is about to be given away. Another thing I look for is the DJ to play "Single Ladies" by Beyonce'. 

I then make a timely exit, often minutes before then. I have missed toasts and almost cake because of this. I even allow up to 15 minutes for this ritual to be complete and I wait outside until I no longer see the bride with her bouquet.  I am then free! 

Now if you like this and you jump for the bouquet, go ahead. But if you're like me and others and would rather not partake, this can help you. 

STARS: Putting together a Homecoming formal/semi-formal

Since I didn't coupon this week and have yet to shadow one of the masters, I decided to focus on another topic.  

I realize some of my best works comes as a result of a social media question and here we go. 

Blacksburg High School has not had at least a semi formal Homecoming in the modern era as other schools do. I have found that money and manpower are the two biggest obstacles, outside of desire. 

Therefore, I would first poll the students , PTA; and even the active alums.  If I get a 2/3rds vote, I move forward with the dance. 

Now this is NOT a prom so no extravagant decorations nor the other frilly stuff is necessary.  I would operate on a shoestring budget and stick to that. 

The tickets would be $3/piece or $5/couple. Photos would be by a local student photographer, refreshments would be light, decorations would be handmade and bought from places such as Dollar Tree and Hobby Lobby. I would employ a house DJ to offer their services or simply obtain a temporary license (around $20/$30) similar to karaoke and play iTunes or Spotify. 

Regarding attire, you would encourage a dress code in the style of thrift shops and even Walmart, not Men's Wearhouse. Even a female could look elegant for $100 or less. I realize parents pay for so much now, especially if the student is a senior. Cost would max at around $100/parent and even less than $40 if you wore something used or low budget. Low budget does exist; I have seen it at plenty of college and adult gatherings. People have a great time and no bank is broken.

You would have it in the cafeteria from 10pm-3am on that Friday night to not interfere with football, Saturday band competitions or anything else. 

I would then make sure I at least broke even at the door and personally see from parental response how much was spent per student. I would try it three times and if it didn't work, then I would scrap it. 

Moral of the story is do not say something can't be done or it is too expensive. I find it ironic this comes from the same fundraising crowd that somehow manages to send Tre and Dawn to Disneyworld or DC but is concerned about a party that may cost as low as $30/person? Here's a quick power tip that may help: not eating out for two weeks would easily net you that money and more alone. 

I will continue to research and gather details but the point is with enough desire and support, it is absolutely doable.

Couponing series: my latest adventure

The store was Dollar General. I had all of my coupons together except one for Bounty Towels. The cashier was even a former coworker of mine. 

I organized how much I would need to get for the $5 off of $25 first, then getting what I needed including what I had specials off it.  The digital coupons matched the paper ones and I saved well and got a decent haul.  

My OOP was close to my goal: $14. I got two Crest toothpastes, a Crest SCOPE mouthwash, three packs of Gilette disposable razors, Nivea lotion, Angel Soft 12 pack toilet paper and a pack of gum. I ended up saving $26. 

I still think I could have did a little better but my first small haul wasn't bad. I used a combination of Klip2Save, a coupon fairy and had 3 P&G inserts (they come once/month). 

I am now prepping for a possible return trip on Halloween weekend and to shadow one of my couponing mentors. That big haul and sub $10 day is coming! 

Couponing series: how to get started

My STAR series is ending for now, sort of. I will discuss couponing but will incorporate the STAR method to do so. 

I saw the huge hauls that many people I know were getting from couponing, often on the small scale. I decided I wanted to try it.

*DISCLAIMER* I am very much a novice. I have the tools and resources but I have yet to hit that huge haul. Join a couponing group or register for a class to receive advanced tips especially for your area. 

That said, I registered for a couponing class.  Biggest takeaways was finding out a good app for digital coupons, www.coupons.com. I learned how to link all of my store accounts and such to take advantage of deals. The best stores in my area appear to be Walgreens, BiLo, Harris Teeter and Dollar General. 

I then discovered different ways to obtain paper coupons. The newspaper, especially the Sunday newspaper is one method.  However you can find folks called "coupon fairies" that sell inserts for certain items you may need and buy more.  Couponing groups and circles have helped me here. 

I also have focused on stores with mass deals and ones that allow me to build up points like Walgreens or BiLo. 

Next, get a 3 ring binder and envelope to organize your coupons by store, product and even date. It's best to go early or late to catch the better deals and miss the longer lines. 

I saved $15 on my one and only haul. I plan on going again this week to Dollar General and my goal is to have less than a $10 OOP (out of pocket cost) for $30 worth of deals. 

It takes work, organization and even downloading apps and having multiple ways to get and print paper coupons but it is worth it. I will continue posting my finds and tips in the coming weeks. I'm ready for that huge $20 for $200 worth of merchandise haul!

STARS: Downloading Music to an MP3 player using YouTube

I had been trying for weeks how to download music onto an MP3 player for my incarcerated uncle.

He cannot have a smartphone so iTunes, Spotify, TIDAL or the other music mediums were out.  I didn't want to pay for a bunch of music either.

I sought out some of my tech support connects and was put onto youtubemp3.today. I actually type that link into my browser. 

I then type the song I want converted to MP3 format. Once that happens, a link appears for me to be able to download the MP3. I found that using the green button yields the better results far as downloading the song. 

I then opened my files and drives. I transferred the songs, around 15-20 at a time from my main drive to the music folder on my MP3 player that was plugged into my PC. I simply copied the downloaded MP3s and pasted them. 

I hope this helps out folks that need or want another medium for listening to their favorite music. 

STARS: Planning a Suprise Party

I grew up in a family that did suprise parties for seemingly everyone, specifically milestone birthdays (18th, 40, 50, etc). 

First thing I do when I plan a suprise party is check with the close friends/family/spouse and see what they have planned and the person's availability.  I also do this when I know the person is into suprises..

I then set a date and venue unbeknownst to the person. I then assign an accomplice (I have played this role at least 6 times). 

One important thing I do is make sure nothing out of the ordinary routine is performed with the person. They will suspect something is off and may get upset, especially at a spouse or significant other. Keep everything routine and covert. 

You then have the accomplice make plans with the person, while everyone else is in place with the party setup and location.  I make sure my story is airtight and ties in within a normal routine. Going to dinner or for a special movie or even to pick something up are common scenarios that tend to work. 

Also, I make sure all parties present hide their cars or park them away from the venue to drown out suspicion. This seems to work better in public. 

I then hold the party, also ensuring everyone is on time so that nothing else is suspect.  Also, the story/lie has to be held up. When you yell "suprise" you want that true element of surprise. 

Hopefully that person has a very pleasant surprise and a good time. 

STARS: Planning a successful family reunion

I think about the second Saturday in September with fond memories. This was the date for years that I held and organized my family reunion.  Due to certain factors, I decided to give it up. However it was a good run. 

I secured a good indoor location and steady date that was memorable and convenient.  I wanted to do it after school started but just before all of the after school activities kicked into full gear. Plus, I wanted a time where the weather would be at a medium temperature. Saturday is typically the best day to do anything socially also. I looked at every month, season and happening and decided upon the second Saturday in September.

I then had to make sure I reserved the location in advance, got the word out via social media, phone calls, texts and word of mouth. I also set up signs and gave directions to assist others in arriving at the venue. Additionally, I had set guidelines for the building and the nearby cemetery. 

I then held the reunion each year. I devised creative ways and activities to encourage folks to stay longer. Family history and old pictures seemed to work the best. 

The reunion was then held, I set up a donation jar to give back to the church since it was free. I arrived early to set up with others and we always left it better than we found it. I also brought some food and made sure that there were plenty of paper products. 

I kept the family reunion going for seven years using this method. It was memorable among many, although attended by few. Therefore if you have a family that really wants a reunion, I hope this post helps

STARS: How To Rest Yourself

Many of us are tired from the summer, back to school, work, the CFA v Popeyes battle.  It's important that we practice self care and recuperate. 

I like to lighten my load for a few days and relax. I do very little TV, social interaction or social media. I get more sleep and relaxation. 

I then do fun things I like such as running, coffee shop, music, writing, and taking a drive.  

I even plan a vacation or a small getaway. Doctors recommend that we take a full week off from work every week. I already have my time scheduled and exactly what I an going to do. 

I also meditate, drink apple cider vinegar and do yoga. Breathing is important. 

I return much more rested and charged and ready to get back in the game.

STARS: How To Successfully Navigate Carowinds

You see many that speak of how to successfully navigate tourist attractions such as Disneyworld. I don't see many that talk about properly navigating Carowinds, especially with a season pass. 

First, I would highly recommend getting a season pass, with at least the drink and meal plans add-ons. The park is now open 10 months out of the year so you have plenty of opportunity to use your pass. General admission ranges from $30-$60 and parking is $20/vehicle. A season pass without add-ons is $105. Therefore, you get a definite return on your investment.  

I would advise riding the rides during the springtime and evenings as it can be cumbersome and uncomfortable to do so during the summer. Also, try to go on weekdays or evenings only. It is extremely crowded on weekends there. 

You also want to spend as little inside the park as possible. Have an extra person to hold your belongings when you ride rides and even when you go to the waterpark so you don't even have to rent a locker. If you don't want a meal plan, no problem. There are restaurants nearby and you can pack a picnic lunch and eat it outside of the park. 

Also, have the app download to your smartphone and know all of the dates from season pass preview night to New Year's Eve. Plan accordingly, the more the merrier, and have fun. 

Lastly, keep a physical copy of your pass and your phone on you, and pack a bag in the warmer weather if you want to attend the waterpark and the general park. Both have different entrances/exits and closing times.  

Failing to plan is planning to fail. Do so and as you may hear over their loudspeaker "enjoy your day at Carowinds!"

STARS: Dealing with someone through an anxiety attack

I only try to talk, especially write, about things I know. I can definitely relate to anxiety and panic attacks since my mom has anxiety and has had many attacks, especially recently.

I recognize that my mom is having an attack through her behavior, silence, eyes, shaking and often crying.  I make sure she is in a quiet, tranquil place. I encourage her to breathe and air out any frustrations. 

Her and I then pray together as we both truly believe in the power of prayer. I then remain quiet and simply there for her. 

Next I then contact her mental health advocate and a crisis hotline, in that order. The number I use is 

Finally, I carefully monitor her throughout the coming days. A person is affected for up to a week after an anxiety attack. They need time to heal and replenish as they often take so much out of a person. 

STARS: Caring for your beard

Yes we are still in the midst of summer. However, with football beginning and Fall, No Shave November, etc, around the corner, you may want to grow a beard. 

Growing and properly caring for a beard is a lifestyle and an art. 

I let mine grow from scratch, from my clean shaven face. I then shape it up into the form I desire a week upon it growing. 

I then continue to shave and shape twice/week due to my sensitive skin and lack of desire for razor bumps. I use premium razors like Gillette. The Dollar Shave Club has proven to be effective also. 

I trim my beard every two weeks using my special beard clippers. It's a great investment to make. Another great one is some sort of beard oil to rub into your beard for smoothness.  I prefer coconut oil which has a variety of usages.  

This is how I reduce gray, keep my beard at a decent thickness and make it healthy looking. You may want to seek out a barbershop or a dermatologist if your beard is not growing and developing as you desire it to be. 

STARS: How I make my version of Sweetie Pie's Mac n Cheese

Reunion and church homecoming season is in full swing. Also, cookout season is still ongoing.  Being able to make a good mac n cheese is not a bad skill to have. 

And here's how I make mine

First I buy all of the necessary ingredients: a 9×12 pan, PAM butter spray, Land O Lakes butter, a block of Velveeta pure cheddar cheese, elbow noodles, a bag of blended cheeses, a bag of shredded cheddar cheese, 3 eggs, a glass of milk, a small container of sour cream. 

I boil the noodles at medium heat while I spray the pan and cut the cheddar block into small squares. I also combine the liquids and sour cream into a bowl and mix to blend. 

I then preheat the oven to 350 degrees and then drain the water out of the noodles. I then transfer the noodles from the strainer to the pan. The liquid is then poured over the noodles. 

I then proceed to put a couple of blocks of butter atop the noodles, along with the blocks of cheese. I then wait for the oven to reach 350 while I spread both bags of cheese atop the entire casserole. 

I then insert the pan into the oven for 35-40 minutes. Once the time has elapsed, I take out the mac and cheese and allow it to sit for five minutes. 

I then get a spatula and prepare to serve and eat my dish. Enjoy! 

STARS: Changing Headlight Bulbs on a 2017 Hyundai sedan

I have had my Hyundai for nearly three years now. My low beam (yes there are separate bulbs for high and low beam lights) recently blew out on me. Therefore I went to the auto parts store and bought two sets of bulbs, high and low beams. 

Now it was time for me to try and install them. 

I'm not a mechanical person by trade so I consulted my resident car guy and had him on standby just in case I needed his assistance. I consulted three YouTube videos to get the expertise I needed. 

I unlocked my car, popped the hood off my car up, then fastened it into place.  I also engaged the parking brake and did it in the evening since it was much cooler. 

Taking off the high beams lights and replacing them are fairly simple as I just had to pop the top off the front of the center lights under the hood. I then carefully grabbed the plug from the back of the light and unfastened it. I then replaced the new bulb and snapped it into place and carefully placed it into the slot. You then close the cap on the high beam interface. 

The low beam light is a bit difficult. You have to turn the inside caps on the ends in the direction they are in. I had to turn left for the left side, right for the right side. I also had a butter knife handy to pop the cap when it was loose. Once the cap was off, I unplugged the fastener on the light. I then turned it in the direction of its position (left=left, right=right). 

I then replaced the bulb just as with the low beam and fastened it securely into place. Once engaged, I placed it back into its place, turning it in the opposite direction to tighten. I placed the cap back onto the opening tight. 

I then turned on the ignition of my vehicle to ensure all of the lights were working and BINGO they were. I was this successful.

Actual maintenance time can be 10-30 minutes depending upon how well you do with unfastening the caps. Replacing the actual lights may be as easy as I have seen in any automobile. 

Well there you have it! Now you can replace your bulbs, which is recommended about every two years or so. 

STARS: Creating a Group Chat and it's advantages

It appears some people still use mass texting.  Often it can result in people and numbers you may not know, being very interpersonal, messy, and impossible to get out of. 

Enter group chats. I realize they sound like trouble but they are easy to get out of, edit, you see people's names rather than numbers and you only need one generalized group. 

Here's how I set up mine. 

You find an app that the majority can agree on. GroupMe is one of the more popular ones.  

I simply came up with a name and an avatar for my group chat.  This can be a group name or something to identify the group by. If you are doing one for a cruise, it could be March Cruise 2020. 

I then proceeded to add the necessary numbers. I had to manually do name and number for those that didn't already have GroupMe installed. 

The reservations that were brought to me included being too hard and long to set up, not being able to edit out certain people in case of a suprise or omission. Well a group chat is built to handle all that. All you need is the single setup, which takes around 15-20 minutes, you can add/delete at anytime, and it's cleaner on your phone. You would eliminate the clutter of one mass text and then another and so on. 

I then finish the group chat and modify accordingly. It is then ready to go. 

There are way more advantages, especially if you wish to stay in the loop with a certain group of people. 

STARS: How I plan for a getaway

I love to travel, or at least go places for a few days out of town. It could be the beach, mountains, Atlanta or Charleston. Either way, I have a plan and I allow flexibility and plan for other instances. 

I look at my budget first and adjust it accordingly.  I then book my hotel/housing arrangements. Then I look at the best route to take and when to take one route versus the other. 

I book and even plan my meals, events and anything that requires advance notice.  Anything else is budgeted. 

I allow for downtime, traffic, extra sleep, Uber/Lyft fares, late checkouts, and even random gas and food stops.

Finally I take my trip, adjust to situations accordingly and have fun. Leisure trips are good with structure but better with some spontaneity. 

Therefore make the best of your time off and what remains of this summer season.

STARS: How to beat a con or a grift

The latest word in Gaffney is that of one Nigia Dawkins. He has scammed and grifted many in the city, myself included.  He got a ride home and a McDonald's meal out of me once. 

He has gotten way more from others using certain lines, scripts, and even a connection with recently deceased rapper Nipsey Hussle. He also started a clothing line and ripped people off this way. 

The saddest part is not how long he has been getting over on folks. It's that there are many, many other Nigias that need to be brought to justice.  

I analyze a person's past behavior, if I know of them first. Also, if someone is saying they are raising money for a charity or organization, I am wanting to know which one so I can research it. 

Another thing I see if there are certain things they say or how they approach  me. Chain messages are definitely a red flag. Additionally, saying they need me to call or meet them ASAP. 

Also, this is how Nigia got me. He said he wanted to stop in McDonald's so we went to the drive thru. He claimed not to have any cash and asked if I would pay.  The trap was set. If you are in this situation, always go into the restaurant or pick a restaurant that allows you to go inside (no drive through types like a Sonic). It also goes without saying it is best to do this before nightfall when more places are open. 

If you know this is an habitual con artist, document every occurrence and get the finest details, down to the time of day. I then contact law enforcement and have him brought to justice.  

Finally, I keep my script and system for any future grifters.  I do have a big heart and I give to the less fortunate. However, always be aware of whom or what you are giving to. And if you travel alone at night, do not give them a ride if you do not know them. Offer to call an Uber or a Lyft. 

Also, cash is a no go to certain people and if it's a business, ask for retail licenses, credentials and such. Since I am a small time retailer, I know what all they are supposed to have. If they stammer and beat around the bush, you beat it. 

We need to have a plan in place to make an example of those who think they can get over like Nigia has did for years. A free meal is one thing. A month's salary (yes he has did this) is a different ballgame. 

STARS: Dealing With a Coworker that pushes your buttons

We all have that difficult coworker/manager/leader/work bully at our jobs.  I will show you how you can wave them off. 

You should try to ignore and avoid them first. Do not initiate any type of contact or interaction with them. 

Second, if they do interact with you in a negative fashion, keep a note of how many times and what time they did such. 

Next, try talking with them, addressing any issues you may have with them. It is often that may tough situations can be rectified when both parties come to an understanding and agreement.  

Now if that person continues a pattern of harassment and disrespect, go to your manager, your HR department, the GM and even the corporate office.  You do not deserve inferior treatment in your place of employment and you must set the precedent. 

STARS: Finding a New Place to Live

Moving and relocating are both tough. Hitting the reset button on life is tougher.

That said, many of us have problems finding a new permanent or forever home. Renting isn't hard; it's the housing process.

The last part isn't easier if you have land.

You have to look at your budget first and what you can afford. If you plan to build, figure those costs in.

Next, find a good realtor and/or contractors.

Also, figure in home improvement and insurance costs. Being saving money by working overtime at your job, and/or working extra jobs. A penny saved is a penny earned. 

Next, zero in on your forever home and make sure it meets your personal preferences. These of course include area, distance from job, school system, etc.

Finally, move into your home, get your keys and enjoy yourself. Moving may be the next STAR topic. 

When They See Us: Nothing New But A Harsh Reminder

I will resume with the STAR series next week as I have a STAR class on Friday. 

But the big watch this weekend was actually When They See Us on Netflix.  It recounts the late 80s case in New York with the Central Park Five wrongly accused of rape and assault.

It's another reminder of how flawed and biased the U.S. justice system is towards black men. Other races get it as well but blacks get it in higher numbers. We have seen the Shawshanks, Hurricanes, and even Life. It's a narrative that has been shoved in our faces but one we cannot lose sight of.

These types of shows both anger and inspire me. It shows why we need to know about the justice system, vote, know our rights and laws and how to fight properly in court. Having a public defender in certain cases will not get the job done, period.

I'm also glad that these now men are doing positive things and haven't let this experience keep them in the system. Nearly 12 years of their lives, not to mention their youth, was robbed and that is not cool.

We have to continue to reverse the narrative and stand for the right things and against the wrong ones.

STARS: Choosing a Workout Instructor/Trainer

This is to continue on last week's post.

We now want to focus on the person or persons that can help you reach your summertime goals, as well as the remainder of the year. Often this is an instructor or a trainer.  Often they are one in the same but the process is similar.

Find out what style of teaching you like and the intensity level you want. If it's HIIT or body pump/RIP, then go with someone that specializes there for example. Try out some classes, go off of recommendations and reviews, see results.

Also, see the instructor's style. How hard do they drive the class? Do they greet you and notice they are there? How is the music selection? Everyone learns differently, and often you need to see for yourself.

Next, see how flexible your schedule/wallet is with the instructor/trainer. This is often the most difficult process. There are several classes and trainers I want to work with, but scheduling conflicts interfere.

Finally, see who you are getting the best results from after about two months and you may have an instructor that can take you to greater heights.

Instructors can be the greatest people in our fitness journey or the worst.  Obviously one would want the former.

STARS: Revamping Your Workout Plan/Regime

I am currently in this process as I fine tune for summer.

Your workouts may be stagnant or nonexistent so here's how you can breathe some life back into them.

First off, keep doing what works. This includes days, location, hours, certain workouts.

Next, add in extra sessions and workouts where necessary to shock the body and routine up some.

Look at your work and social schedule and see where it would be best to work out and get up. If you are devoted to movie and taco night, then you will have to readjust.

Keep a journal of your weigh ins (weekly), food consumed, and your actual workout sessions.

Finally, get help from a trainer and class, even virtual.  There are so many great ones out there you would have to do your research to see what works best for your body type, schedule and regimen.  Perhaps that can be next week's STAR format.

Good luck, you can do it!

STARS: Closing a Controversial Social Media Post

You have just posted something to social media that has stirred the pot and has a lot of people's emotions on 10. You could just delete it but you really believe in what you posted. The timing or wording just might not have been proper.

First, make sure everyone stays on topic and there is no bashing.  After about the 30th comment, it gets more notice in the algorithm, allowing almost 3 times as many folks to see it.

You then have a mediator or two that has your back and can make trolls and keyboard warriors go away. I call these conversation closers.

Next, delete the comments that are irrelevant, ridiculous and disrespectful. The same goes with the people. Some should be hidden, others deleted, the rest blocked. One thing about posts like this is you discovered who shouldn't be allowed to troll your postings.

After this, the post tends to die down and you have made your point. Continue posting what you believe and filter out the folk that just wanna be difficult.

STARS: making a successful delivery

Last week's post focused on customer service and getting what you deserve from a company that you pay monies to. Well this comes from a negative customer experience I had recently. This also stems from my experience with delivery companies and working for Amazon and doing rideshare.

Alright if your newspaper company did not deliver your paper successfully to your house, here is the best way they can get it to you.

They need to find out your address, and phone number in case they cannot find said address or could not get there. Utilize a GPS app such as Google Maps or Waze. It's safe to say most people have a smartphone that will support either app.

You then embark on your trip with the best route, looking for delays and even shortcuts. If the paper is successfully delivered, no confirmation is necessary.  If it wasn't, that customer should be contacted.  The same applies if the delivery person gets lost or cannot find the residence. When I drove rideshare, we were required to call the person if we could not find them(happens more than you know). The same principle should apply here. This way, the person receives their goods and/or products. 

I figured this scenario and solution would fit good into the STAR format. It really is not rocket science to make a successful delivery. Most times some party (the company, USPS, etc) dropped the ball. It's not enough to give the customer a credit or a refund, they want their product. Otherwise, you will lose business.

STARS: getting what you deserve from a company with bad customer service

I hear all the time about people getting screwed over by companies and even bullied. I'm unsure why anyone would tolerate this nonsense.

Bullying and social exclusion are being discussed on www.imjustdrew.com in preparation for my second book. However this is moreso how to get what you rightly deserve from a company that isn't quite giving you the Chick Fil-A treatment.

Alright well first of all demand to speak to the immediate management of the company you're dealing with. Many of them can handle stuff onsite, no problem.

If you don't get results that way, go to their higher ups and corporate. Pro tip: if it's a cell phone and/or cable/satellite provider, contact the FCC. Their information is published on their website and they take complaints very seriously. 

Additionally, ask to be forwarded to a retention/rewards department.  You can get your bills lowered; reduced, and often even comped.  Some companies have been known to give extra perks when a customer is angry. It's a competitive market and they are not trying to lose customers. 

In the past, I have recieved phone calls from corporate reps and even CEOs, free service, discounts, deals, prizes, handwritten apologies.  And honestly I'm not much different from much.  I just wasn't scared to speak my mind and called these places on their mistakes. 

We have to hold certain companies accountable.  This year alone, more than 10 retail companies have went belly up. The hundreds of others are definitely minding their Ps and Qs.

Therefore fight for your money, entertainment and what you believe in!

STARS: Preparing for a cookout/BBQ

It's that season! The weather is again warm, the grass is growing and time to fire the grill up.

I actually fire mine up year round but it's time to go to cookouts and BBQs. Some of you don't know where to start when planning to host your first one. Well I'm here to help.

First, clean up your yard/house/area that you plan where your guests are gonna be. 

Next, have a grill, doesn't have to be big or extravagant, just adequate for the meats you are grilling.

Then buy the meats. I would suggest a good butcher shop or Sunnydales. I know it's expensive and borderline bougie but the meat simply tastes better. Allow your guests to bring sides and drinks, you can provide a few. But the meats are usually on the host.

Have games and music ready, a date and time, and let your people know. Also, alert the neighbors in case of parking and noise ordinances.

Finally, have fun, eat good food and make memories!

STARS: Preparing For Your First Race

Spring race season is beginning for many runners: novice and experienced. For many, that race is the Cooper River Bridge Run in Charleston, SC. It's a fine race for all levels.

First off, you need the proper equipment.  Basics first, then other extras as your training and preferences see fit. Have a good pair of running shoes. These need not break the bank, but brands such as Asics, Brooks, and Hokas have been popular among runners. You also want comfortable running gear. If you're already actively working out, you more than likely have this stuff already. Comfortable socks, shirts, shorts and even caps.

Then there's the extras. Music works for some folks and not so well for others. Making a nice investment in wireless earphones can be a huge help. Having a fanny pack is a huge help for items such as your phone, keys, wallet, etc. You can also buy a holder for your phone that fits on your wrist or arm. I'm not a fan personally of that. Next, you can choose to use one of the many running apps on your phone such as RunKeeper, Nike Running or Strava. Or you can utilize the fitness portion of your smartwatch or Garmin or Fitbit device.  Also, if you run in the dark, have headlamps, reflective clothing and even bands.

You generally want to start training for a race at least two months in advance, especially a 5K or a 10K. Start slowly, running a couple of miles at a time. Have your route carefully mapped out and run at a time where traffic is light and the weather isn't so cold or hot. You want to ensure you're capable of running the distance of your upcoming race. Build up to your desired level and maintain it.

Next, practice nuances and scenarios. Race morning can be crazy and you want to set a certain routine (this includes even the layering of your clothing) so when the day comes, all you need to focus on is running the race, being safe and having fun.

So hit the pavement or trail and happy running!

STARS: Preparing/Deciding If You Can Take A Cruise

Many of you know how high I am on cruises. To me, they are the ultimate vacation,  as they embody so many different aspects of a vacation.

While deciding if you can take a cruise, there are some aspects to look at.

First, your budget/wallet. See if you can afford to go. Many are as low as $400, some on into the 1,000s. Look at the price, especially if you're going solo, and start there.

Next, see when the dates are and how much time off from work you have to use. You may need to use more than a week so look at the dates carefully.

Also, plan carefully if it's hurricane season (end of August-end of October). Yes boats direct around storms and the prices are lower, but risk versus reward must be measured.

The next part will be getting all of your intangibles ready such as your passport, your long form birth certificate, travel arrangements unless they are included and monies for extra.
Really it boils down to a money and a time thing.

Therefore, if everything lines up properly, go for it! You literally only live once and it could be a great experience for you. It's all about planning, really, from start to finish. 

STARS: How SAT proctors control academic scandals

These college admissions scandals have been a hot button topic this week. For me, the SAT scores have been more suspect than anything. I have served as an SAT and LSAT proctor on the side for 5 years now.

I'm sure new training will be released to deal with the ongoing scandal and bad press but our current security measures makes it very difficult to falsify your identity or results.

First of all, students's IDs are checked at the entrance to the testing center and when they enter their classrooms. They must have valid photo identification(school IDs count and of course passports, anything issued by the DMV, etc). The pictures must also match the person and the admission ticket that the College Board issues to them. The student must have these tools in place before they are allowed to take the test and they must have them in a timely matter. Failure to do so results in them not being able to take the exam.

Also, once inside, any electronics other than an acceptable calculator are confiscated until the end of the test. Bathroom breaks can be taken during the test but they must not talk to anyone and have to have their admissions ticket and ID with them at all times. They aren't even allowed food nor beverage except during their administered breaks. 

Parents and no one else is permitted inside the testing center once testing begins. I have had to gatekeep against several parents who show up at noon to pick up their child, but they may not finish until 1pm.

The tests are sealed and packaged until the day of testing and each student has a different test. Same sections, but different tests. Proctors are also trained to watch subtle and creative signs of cheating.

Therefore, throughout my 5 years, if the center is at fault, it is a rogue center and one with zero integrity. I'm blessed to say my center has a zero tolerance policy regarding cheating and falsifying test scores.

This will be a saga and a scenario watched more closely in the future. Few will still slip through the cracks, but it is on the testing center and administrators to ensure that the students are receiving the fairest treatment and scores.

STARS: Prepping to Lose Weight, Even If Only a Few Pounds

Every now and then I fall off the wagon. I have gained as little as 5 lbs and as high as 80 lbs.

The intensity of each process may vary, but the actual processes are the same.

I decide which methods of diet and exercise I wish to utilize. Do I want to cut carbs? Will I allow myself sweets? Am I counting calories? How many days/week am I working out?

Currently, in accordance with Lent, I am cutting out carbs and sugars, including even many fruits. I am also working out no less than 5 days/week, at least 3 of those will involve running/heavy cardio. These routines will be modified monthly to avoid plateauing.

Additionally, I am increasing my protein intake, including different types of meat, pork, chicken, etc. I am also trying not to eat too late. I have learned my body and have experiences how I metabolize food so I know what does work for me.

Currently doing this, I am down 10 pounds and am shooting for 2-5 pounds a week. Every lb lost is an accomplishment and I will continue to weigh in weekly and monitor my food and beverage intake and physical activity.

STARS: Becoming a Blogger

I figured this was a good topic to start this new series with.

I have been blogging for nearly 9 years with worldwide views in the 100,000 range. This has spawned another blog related to my overall business and my writing career.

I have always been adept at starting and engaging healthy discussions and conversations with good, thought provoking topics.  Many told me I should blog. I put it off but then decided in April 2010 to give it a shot.

Blogger was the popular platform at that time, especially since I have a gmail account. During these days, I had to do them from my laptop as they weren't readily available on a smartphone. Well I came up with some topics and ideas and went from there.

I would blog up to once/week and at times have blogged up to twice/week. Many would love these, comment and share them. They of course would start further conversations and discussions.

9 years later, I would have never guessed that blogging would still be a thing. It fortunately is and I blog twice/week, on here and on www.imjustdrew.com. I also occasionally vlog on Facebook and YouTube and am currently working on my second book. 

Blogging is one of my biggest ways for stress relief and to express myself.  Nearly 500 blog posts later, it still remains strong for me.

Now what do I have planned for year 10? We will have to see!

Being prepared for extreme stretches of rain

This has been the most rainy of weeks, months, and years I have ever seen. As a result, mine and many other yards are a mess and are wet. My driveway desperately needs to be regraveled. Also, there has been about a 2 foot wide pothole formed in front of the traffic light leading to the Walmart in Gaffney. I also cannot keep my shoes clean.

Here are some tips and pointers I have picked up for survival during these times.

1. Go out only when necessary and try to drive during the day if possible.
2. Check at least four forecasts for any updates and plan your days accordingly.
3. Don't park in grassy areas and use caution at bridges and mud holes. Like the giant pothole in Gaffney, it could be worse than you think.
4. Buy like you would for a winterstorm: stock up for days in advance.
5. Keep your natural cold and flu remedies on standby as temps do fluctuate during these times.
6. Dress with some sort of boots or cleated shoes, long coats and pants with high cuffs.
7. Watch out for flooding and leaky areas.
8. Have plenty of milk or a strong source of Vitamin D. Days without sunshine can emotionally deplete you.

These are some to help get you through these times. If you don't live in an area like Seattle or London, you may not be used to all of this. Therefore, be prepared and plan carefully.

Car information: key remotes

Many advancements in technology have trickled down to even automobiles.  Over the past couple of decades, it has been cool to have a keyless remote to unlock your car, trunk, start your engine, and serve as a security system. I wouldn't have a car without one.

Well unknown to me, if the battery in the remotes dies after the system alerts you that is low, you could be stranded.  Yes there are keys inserted in many of these newer remotes. But the car is programmed to recognize an active key or it will not start. That is equally confusing and refreshing.  My spare was misplaced in the middle of a cleaning incident also. Therefore, I had to pray as hard as I have in the past to get to the nearest store and obtain the proper tools necessary to replace my remote battery before I was stranded.

After looking at YouTube tutorials and contacting my sales rep about the warranty, I had my key remote battery replaced and was good once again.

Details can be missed at the point of sale and even within your own research and experience. However I know now and want to let others know to preserve their car remote and the batteries: know their shelf life and factory warranties. Knowledge is power and ignorance isn't always bliss. 

My backup should be found or replaced really soon, and I have three spare batteries. Therefore I am good and educated for a while.

Being that this is tax season and many of you are buying and upgrading your vehicles, this is the type of stuff to look for. Don't let yourself get stressed nor stranded, know what you have and how to properly replace it.

LeBron v KD: ok, let's talk

It appears the heir apparent to LeBron James's crown as the best overall player in the NBA is Kevin Durant.

Many could say a couple of other players, but player to player, stat to stat, and intangibles, KD comes the closest.

He isn't there just yet for various reasons.

The stats all time aren't in Durant's favor. Bron dunks more and doesn't shoot as much (doesn't mean he can't shoot). Nevertheless, Bron scores in other ways and will allow superstars to get involved to put the best product out there. Yes I know what team Durant is currently on, but Bron has now did this on three different squads.

While Durant is great, he hasn't showed killer instinct or the ability to take over a game yet.  You cannot show you are the best until you do this consistently.

Also, LeBron has carried many of his teams on his back. Durant has carried maybe two, and is surrounded by a superteam currently. LeBron let the league in minutes played for 3 or 4 seasons. Durant didn't even do that at OKC, although they weren't deep at the time either.

Finally, Durant still hasn't developed himself into being the face of the league. He has to score more, demand the ball more, be more aggressive, stronger (an issue he's had all of his career) and perhaps more visibility in the form of endorsements and giving back to the community. Bron may have a four year head start on KD but still stands head and shoulders above the rest there also.

Next year may be a year of changes for Durant. Could that come in going to a team like the Knicks and showing he can carry a struggling team to greater heights. Time will tell.

Meanwhile, just see things as they are.

Ike's Korner Kitchen has taken the burger crown!

During a month and time where most want to get healthier, it's tempting to step out for a cheat. This is what I did over the weekend. I finally tried Ike's Korner Kitchen in Spartanburg.

I have spent a lot of time in Spartanburg the past six years and have tried nearly every restaurant there. This one was harder to try due to its erratic hours. On Fridays, as most restaurants are, it's slam packed.

It's a very intimate place with a small bar and a huge grill steadily filled with burgers and other various food items. I have tried many burgers but I think I have found a place that tops them off. Ike's has that fresh (not frozen) taste and enough grease to lube your car. It's simply a good place with better food, great atmosphere and a good, attentive, polite staff.

I would recommend to get there early to avoid a crowd and order takeout if you're cutting it close to closing time. They are also not overly priced either for the quantity.

Give them a try if you're in Spartanburg sometime, especially if you're a burger lover. You're sure to enjoy it!

Y'all mad over hamberders?

Maan not hamberders!

Look I have never been a fan of Donald Trump, not even as a child.  I definitely am not a fan of his as president. However, serving the Clemson Tigers an array of fast food at the White House is certainly not the worst thing he or any previous presidents has did.

Yes he could have served them higher quality food or had some fine cuisine catered in. However, you need to understand some logistics here. One, championship teams usually don't even eat at the White House on their visits. And when they do, you don't hear about if they did and what. Two, these are college students we're talking about, athletes at that. They are broke for the most part and are forbidden from even accepting a chicken sandwich from a booster. So yeah they will enjoy fast food (and they did). Third, being that they are athletes, their regimens have to be strict, so much so that during the season they aren't allowed a lot of greasy or fast food. Trump gave them the chance to really unwind and celebrate.  Lastly, let's be honest, Trump wanted to turn the attention on himself, the government shutdown and the reasoning behind it. It took away from Clemson's moment but it wouldn't have mattered what he would have served, people would have complained.

Therefore, let's find solutions to survive this shutdown instead of surviving R. Kelly. There are bigger matters at hand.

That said, I remember most of the people that complained during this week. I better not see any of you having a fast food buffet or the like at even a child's birthday party or consider yourself called out. Period.

Binge watching

I have actually been binge watching shows since I was a little boy. During summers I would tape all of my favorite shows and cartoons and spend many days watching them.

30 odd years later, here I am. 

I stream stuff from Netflix and Hulu, plus I have my DVD collection. It's a good way to unwind and remind you why a show is so good.  It is also a good way to catch up, spoiler free.

Sometimes you don't want to be out at the clubs or the bar watching the games.  Just some old episodes/marathon of a classic show will good.

Football is getting down to the wire and is almost over.  Basketball is still on but it seems there are more gaps. Most likely I will spent Valentine's weekend in Charlotte for All-Stars or binge watching a show. It's all in how I feel really.

We are divided on so much in this country. Most can agree a good TV/movie marathon with junk food and snacks can be relaxing and therapeutic.

Playoffs? All sports need them

We're almost near an awesome time if you're a sports fan. The Super Bowl, March Madness and then the NBA playoffs. And (as the Grammys would say, that's just the first half of the year.

Yes I know tomorrow is the college football national championship game between Clemson and Alabama. But this matchup came as a resulted of a flawed playoff system.

Many cynics and critics said that Notre Dame didn't belong in the College Football Playoff because they don't belong to a conference. Others said UCF and even Georgia belonged. Either way, the past few years have showed many holes in the current playoff format.

One, there is no set criteria. A committee of experts chooses the four best college football teams at the end of the season. Secondly, conference championships or appearances do not matter. Third, four teams is far too few. This is only a couple of steps up from the BCS.

A possible solution would be to expand to eight teams, five teams being the Power 5 conference champions, and three at large teams. Criteria would include quality wins, SSI rankings, strength of schedule, rank in conference, good and bad losses. People will still argue and complain but this improves things.

And to those that say the regular season does not matter, refer to the introductory paragraph. People still watch football of all levels every weekend. NASCAR fans still watch races weekly. A small playoff is usually better for a sport like baseball with a lot of teams that play a lot of games. It doesn't work for a sport that only plays about 11-13 games, period.

Finally, before you judge which teams do or do not belong in a playoff, think carefully again.  College football (the Division I) is the ONLY sport that suffers from this. Money aside, what is everyone else doing right and what all is college football doing wrong?