Domestic Violence: Let's All Be Accountable

It has been a strong narrative for a while about battered women, women that don't or can't get out and end up getting killed or seriously harmed.

Given all that I have seen happen over the years, this has been weighing heavily on my mind and heart this week. I have even went back and did more research to ensure I didn't miss any detail or leave any stone unturned.

It comes down to this: at its core, we are ALL responsible as adults.  We have to check on and take care of each other in these situations, men and women. We have to be better partners, lovers, people. If there are emotional and psychological issues, we have to seek help and get it.

Also, we have to screen out people better. People do come with warning labels and often instructions. These come in the forms of abusive and violent pasts, quick tempers, uneasy demeanors, bad energy. so on and so forth. If you wouldn't be around that person as even an associate, why do you have that person as a romantic partner.

Furthermore, there are more resources now than ever regarding shelters, crisis counters and hotlines. You shouldn't have to stay in a bad situation without first trying to get out. There are options and you don't need to be subjected to poor behavior of any kind.

Finally, there are limits to what you can do as a person. Adults will be with who they want. You can offer them help, guidance, resources, etc. But until they want to start helping themselves also and removing themselves from these situations, your efforts are falling on deaf ears.

Let's continue to educate and talk to each other calmly about this issue. It can be controlled if we fight it.

Vacation tips and even quick savings methods

I have been off for quite a while celebrating my birthday. It feels good to be 40 and to still be doing what I love to do. One of those is traveling.

Speaking of traveling, here are some pointers to maximize your travel experience:

1. Whether through spending or planning, start early and often. You cannot do this last minute and have a great experience. Especially if you're traveling out of the country.  You have to have all of your expenses covered, vacation time at work approved (or if you're an entrepreneur, plan around that), get your passport straightened out and have spending money.

2. Save about $10-$20/week to assist towards your expenses. Give up eating out at lunch or even dinner. Coupon more, use travel and dinner deals, and shop at places like Aldis and Old Navy. Once you go on that vacation, you'll be glad you tightened up.

3. Sign up more for overtime at your job, do some legal side hustles, just anything for extra money. This is your play money. I have kept a play money account for years. It's all in how you budget or save.

4. Get a low interest travel credit card. You won't see me pushing a credit card often at all but this type of card can give you bonuses and such on hotel, transportation and often food and beverage on vacations. 

5. Final tip: have your house safe and secure before you leave.  The best method is to get a housesitter and not post anything on social media until you return. Yes you can take all the precautions you want. But if no one but a select few knows that you're gone, it can prevent many accidents from happen.

That say, save your money, take that trip and have fun!

All These Lanes

Yeah it's hot, I'm old and I'm mad.

I've been doing a great job maintaining my irritation.  But someone is always trying my goodnatured demeanor. 

Here are a few points of interest (may need to add them to the instruction manual)

1. If you haven't spoken to me in months, address me properly. Don't embarrass me, berate me, etc

2. If you're talking to me in person, #1 still applies

3. Mind your business. If it doesn't apply to you, step off. Let certain authorities handle it

4. Don't talk down to me, be condescending or catch a tone or attitude with me. It won't end well, trust me.

5. If you're feeling angry, moody or whatever, take a pause, gather your thoughts and return back later so we can have a civil conversation

6. Don't be all in the Kool-aid and not know the flavor.  When you come for and/or at me, know what you're talking about.

7. Sweep around your own front porch before you try to point out my flaws and mistakes. None of us are perfect..

8. Finally, don't insult my intelligence or play a game of wits with me. I can play also and again, it won't end well.

Ok just so we're all clear here. I will go full Drew and have zero tolerance for nonsense. So take that mess somewhere else. You're only making yourself look foolish.