Women: You Deserve MORE, PERIOD

Ok this is usually the time of year where men and women alike start trying to get that special someone for the colder weather.  I've written about this from several different angles. Here is another one regarding a woman's self-worth.

Alicia Keys wrote and recorded a song over a decade ago "A Woman's Worth." The gist of it is that women will lower themselves to the lowest common denominator just to have someone. They will be with a mate that abuses them physically and mentally, neglects them, and simply doesn't have much to offer in return.  They pretty much prefer to be committed and miserable than single and lonely.

The title is simple my females: you DESERVE MORE!!!

Now I'm not just talking money, jewelry, or other material possessions.  It's always nice when someone can take care of you financially.  However, love yourself and know your worth. Make that person want to love you as well, show you affection, laugh with you, be your best friend.  That's what really counts in the end.

Now I'm not one to reference Steve Harvey often but he was right in saying sometimes you have to require more of yourself from suitors. That's right, raise and adjust those standards. Get the man that will go the extra mile. Have that person that will stand tall for you and not back down when the going gets tough. You need you a warrior on your team.

It's time to stop complaining about the lack of good men when you are dating the same "type" of man. Look within yourself and see what you attract. Often you will find you're better than that.

So ladies, please don't settle, simply settle down when that real love comes along.  Leave the games on the playground and go get what is yours!

Dogging Men Out: The Women That Do It And How The Tables Have Turned

It appears women are becoming more than whores. The paradigm has shifted and they are becoming more like men far as how they approach the game of love.
Women now, especially the younger generation, have become the players and heartbreakers. I have seen this since I started dating. But the number of women that are playing men, blowing them off, not answering calls, etc has increased.
Once upon a time, you could blame a lack of father figure for this. However, that seems to have the opposite effect for ladies with good fathers. Often they can become rebellious because their father may have sheltered them or because they see how great Daddy is, and find that boring. They're not trying to settle too soon.
Therefore, are the pool of available men to blame for this? Well the bad men certainly can be the culprits as they have some of these women so twisted and scorned. Steve Harvey has also gotten into women's heads over the years, getting them to "Think Like A Man". Apparently thinking like yourself is no longer vogue. However, some men are just dumb and horny. They're the ones who will allow themselves to get played and manipulated by women. Sometimes it isn't their fault, but often they aren't thinking with the proper head.
Women have started to realize the power of sex, and lack thereof. There are many that basically cheat life and get what they want without hard work. They become business women as their bills are paid, their children wear nice clothes, and they go on extravagant vacations.
Personally, I believe in spoiling that special someone. However, give and take must exist, and I've grown too old to let a woman take advantage of me. I've had women parade other guys around me, never call back, and when I ask for her number, give me a fake number. The latter is tougher now of course with cell phones. 
I read a FB status the other day from an obviously bitter woman. She said that ALL men are bad until they prove her otherwise. This behavior helps fostering gold digging and selfish behavior. Women, I assure you there are good men out there. Just don't allow yourself to become a shell of who you formally were because of a romance gone wrong.
Two wrongs do not make a right, so turning the tables on the opposite sex is dangerous and dirty. Keep your head up in the game of love and you can have more satisfaction.

Yes We're Talking About Love Again

It seems love and relationships are always a popular topic, especially around young adults. Often I will see a blog or podcast and I can predict the topic and outline before even viewing the byline. Heck I have even gotten with the program myself and have been writing more blogs and articles related to love and romance.

The topic couldn't be hotter than right now. Springtime, women showing more skin, more weddings and breakups, and just a sense of overall renewal. Plus, Steve Harvey and his book-turned movie Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man has many folks talking. People in churches, workplace water coolers, barbershops and beauty salons, social media, and social gatherings are talking up love.

This is not a bad thing either. Most all of us may not desire marriage or a relationship. But many do desire companionship from someone they can be intimate with. Often sex is involved, especially for the men, but nonetheless affection from another person seems to be a cure-all.

Basically everyone between 25-50 can relate. They have been in love, in relationships, are sexually active, have been married, heartbroken, rejected, and simply been active in the game of love. And the game is serious once you're a grown working adult and have more worldly experience and insight. It's a good and easy conversation piece, even moreso than the weather.

Now there are folks, myself included, that prefer to keep portions of their love life private. However, they will still discuss love, sex, dating, attractions, marriage, and divorce at length.

It's honestly an awesome feeling to be in love and in like. I truly believe you must like a person first before you can love them. The feeling is also awesome when they feel the same way and then you begin discussing, well, love and other subjects and explore dating options.

Now when the relationship doesn't last and breakups and heartbreaks come, that's even worse. It was still good to love and be loved. However misery loves company. Also, with a divorce rate of over 50%, rejection and heartbreak are subtopics of love and relationships.

Love has been around since the beginning of time with Adam and Eve, and its not going anywhere. We may not admit it, but we do like companionship, and seeing other folks in happy relationships. 

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Top 7: Ways/Hints that you are getting a female to go the distance late

Ok this started with a conversation in one of my FB groups. Many of you know I'm old school. However, I try to stay hip to new lingo, especially when it comes to sex and love. Back when I was in my teens and early twenties, asking a female to"chill" was simply that. Now it almost always implies sex, ESPECIALLY if its late night. Remember the old saying "Nothing good happens after midnight" I'm also starting to realize this as I grow older.

I decided for this week's Top 7 to compile a list of inneudos fellas often use to get into a woman's drawers during the late hours. Don't worry fellas, I'm not Steve Harvey, I'm only giving away scraps, not our entire repertoire. Some things should remain sacred.

1. Chill.

This is obviously #1. Ladies, 9 times out of 10, a guy is not telling you to come chill late at night for company. He wants more, and the later the hour, the more he expects, especially if he's known you a while.

2. Coffee

This is age old, but still a goodie. A guy will often invite a gal in for coffee after a late night date or party. This of course is designed to keep you awake for potential extracurricular activity, plus still give you enough juice to drive home that night if you're sober.

3. Movie marathon

He may invite you over to watch a few movies in the early evening.  This could turn into a movie marathon, and then a sex marathon. If the guy has like a stack of 10 DVDs and later starts playing Luther or Marvin in the background, another marathon may begin.  Have on the appropriate shoes, whether you're ready to hop in the bed, or run for cover out the nearest exit.

4. You're drunk, sleep it off here.

Due to excessive partying, drinking, and strict DUI laws, this is also effective. The guy may also be genuinely concerned. However, if he was helping you get to this drunken state, he may have had an agenda. Our judgment is obviously impaired when we're under the influence, so please be careful and take precaution beforehand.

5. Waffle House/Dennys

This could apply to any after hours joint. The two of you decide to go to Waffle House, Dennys, White Castle, or somewhere open late to fill that craving. This craving you're filling could also lead to another craving the guy is having. Don't be caught off guard, it does happen.

6. It's Too Late For You To Drive Home.

A number of scenarios, even some previously mentioned could lead to this. You have been up studying late for a big exam, partying, movies, or "chilling" for real. This time, though, the guy doesn't brew any coffee or have any energy drinks available. He would rather you stay the night and not be out alone as a single female. This may be true, but this is also an opportunity for him to seduce you. Your judgement is still in tact so use it.

7. Late night house party

It is definitely the season for these. Cookouts, bonfires, and just drinking parties. Rather than go home, the host may offer that some of the guests stay the night (especially if its a small party). This could quickly turn into an all night orgy, or just where folks pick and choose who they wanna be we.

The reality is, casual sex still does happen. More often than naught, if you're a woman and you're with a man late, sex is almost inevitable or anticipated. We do have other techniques and tricks for getting the cookie, but these are 7 basics to watch for.

Finally, be careful who you trust and "chill" with

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