Let's Get Ready To Rumble: Mother and Child Edition

Many of us get into it with our mothers from time to time.Even as adults, we may not still curse or talk back to them. But there has seemingly been a collective head bumping since puberty that seems to take decades to taper off.

I can speak from experience here. My mom and I have gotten really heated at times. We have had to fall back from each other for often days at a time. Yes we have an awesome relationship but it's not all peaches and cream.

It seems like girls are more than likely to fight and fuss with their mothers, while guys typically want to be more protective and quiet.  Also with guys, you want to treat your mother well. That's where it starts as a child. You will tend to treat other women well.

Here are four quick tips on facilitating the healing after a blowout with your mom.

1. Distance

Realize what has happened and back away from the situation. Trust me here. Give it a day or two, then talk it out like civilized adults.

2. Admit your shortcomings.

Yes when mama's unhappy, everybody is, even when she's in the wrong. Admit your own faults, and try to find common ground. 

3. Let It Go

Sometimes it's simply not that crucial to be getting all upset about. It could also have long term effects. You may win the battle, but you'll lose the war. Choose your words and battles carefully and know when to leave it alone.

4. End the altercation in peace.

This is the hardest but after common ground, find some peace in the midst of conflict. You may need a buffer to assist,  but you don't wanna leave things too tense for too long. Most of us want peace and not war anyways, especially with the person that brought us into this world.

Remember fights are often inevitable but there's usually nothing beyond repair. Keep it moving and don't stop loving your mother. You only have one after all.

What is the worst fight you and your mother ever had? How did you deal with it?

Seven Different Types Of Mothers (All Are Special)

I have another series coming up and since it's almost Mother's Day, I thought there was no better time to start this about mothers and some of the different types. I will focus on some of the positive and comical types to keep this post lighthearted and loving. 

1. The Smother

You know her, you've seen her, you may be her. You're overprotective, at the school or wherever in a New York minute to come to your child's rescue. Some may critique you because you won't allow your child to be involved in much and it appears you are sheltering them. However, this is simply your way of showing love and that is not always wrong.

2. The Super-Competitive

This is the mom that not only wants to keep up with the Joneses or be the average sports moms, they encourage and drive their children to be the best at everything they do: school, music, and sports. They may even take this as a reflection of them. They have a competitive, winning power, and they want their kids to have it as well. That being said,...

3. The Soccer Mom

You cannot forget this mom , even minus the minivan or SUV. They are super involved in any and every activity that the child is in. You often think they either work at the school or coach the team because you see them so often. However, they are simply that involved. They also lead every major committee and fundraiser, and often serve as surrogates to the other children.

4. The Neighborhood Mom/Surrogate.

Who remembers back in the 80s and early 90s the mom on the block that always fed you snacks and perhaps even served other parental roles and responsibilities? This type of mom still exists, but is more rare. They took care of their children and kept an eye out for the other kids as well. It was the village mentality, not leaving any child behind.

5.  The Modern Mom

This can be broad but to define "modern" means more innovative, hip, and into the modern times. They have full time careers and activities and balance these and motherhood well. These moms may be the most common as many households are now two income. They may lack flash and flare, but they are still good mothers and get the job done.

6. The Single Mom

I would be remissed (and perhaps disowned by my own mother and several friends and relatives) if I left this one out. It needs very little explanation but it takes independence and modern to another level. They have to play both parental roles, and they may be run down because they have very little help. You better believe this is the toughest job in the world, with seemingly no end in sight. I'm willing to bet the President of the United States has more time on his hands than a single mother.

7. The Best Friend

This is almost impossible and takes lot of work. However, with the proper children and parents, it came become reality, especially as the kids become older. You realize how important your mother is, how much she does care, and that she won't leave you when others have.

I will leave this list at seven and may add more in future series. But as we celebrate Mother's Day, let's celebrate all of their sacrifices. Nine months (give or take a few weeks) in labor, sleepless nights, no break, little to no pay, and still doing it with lots of love and care. Happy Mother's Day to all of the true mother figures!

Crutches In Life

Co-dependency can be a huge problem. Don't get me wrong, we all need a helping hand sometimes. But at some point, no one is going to hold your hand all the time.

We like to use many people, things, and circumstances as crutches or excuses. We use our family, spouses, friends, even the Lord. There are folks that even use public figures, celebrities and the slowly recovering economy as a crutch. It's not always a pretty sight.

People often get criticized and ridiculed for being lazy and/or not being independent enough. However, when you take advantage of something and you can't stand on your own two feet mentally, it's really serious and crucial.

Heck cell phones are even a crutch, and probably the latest and biggest one. Before no one could simply go without one. Now everywhere you go: malls, social gatherings, sporting events and restaurants, people are overly dependent on their mobile devices. It's their alarm clock, camera, computer, music player, day planner, their whole lives basically. Google and Apple continue to manufacture phones that keep users hooked. Currently people feel they have to get the iPhone 5 at some point. To me, that's a crutch if you don't have any other alternatives, and it can become dangerous.

Once again, we all need aids and help sometime. But if you can't be your own person, stand for something, make important decisions and judgment calls, you have maturing to do.

Unfortunately, too many people never grow out of this funk of co-dependency. It all starts with the person's mentality. One must wake up, smell the coffee, and realize that life is real and they gotta get real also.

One should be grateful that they have the tools and gifts where they do not have to be completely reliant on some type of crutch. The Good Lord giveth and taketh. Consequently, he can take something precious from you if its in his plan. One must remember that not every is guaranteed or lasts forever. Cherish what you have, before it becomes what you had.

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