Showing posts with label Casey Anthony. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Casey Anthony. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

2011 End Of Year Cowbell List

It's that time once again.  2011 is ending and 2012 is about to begin with my final blog of the year focusing on some of the craziest things since the summer. Once again, my lovely and intelligent friend Regina Wright assists me in pointing out what could use more cowbell.  Enjoy and feel free to comment or suggest your own.


- Ndamukgong Suh of the Detroit Lions. Dude you are wasting your talent and ruining your NFL career with your bad temper. Two words for you man: Albert Haynesworth


- Atlanta Braves:  Blowing the wild card lead in the final month of the year and allowing the St Louis Cardinals to get into the MLB playoffs and win it all. 


Trifling women and men. You guys continue to put a damper on romance and keep the divorce rate climbing.


Cellphone companies:  Many of you except for Sprint are capping data usage.  You are going to have to give in sooner or later before you lose millions.  Sprint already has the Evo and the iPhone 4s


CP time: its not an excuse black people, its just careless and irresponsible, and must end.


Jack and Jill: Great fairy tale, below average movie. C'mon Adam Sandler, what were you thinking?


December movies: Usually the month of December is filled with compelling, Oscar worthy movies. This year, its starting to mirror the middle of summer with subpar sequels and sappy comedies and love stories.


Urban Meyer: Why do college coaches continue to lie when they are about to take another college job? And at The Ohio State of all places, which won't be a contender until probably 2019.


- David Stern: You are becoming quite the DICKtator. How are you going to block the Chris Paul trade to the Lakers, then allow him to go to the Clippers? I understand you are trying to give small market teams a fighting chance, but it seems that ship has sailed after Boston, Miami, New York, and Chicago have all upgraded. Be fair across the board.


Kobe. You just cannot stay off of this list. Now Vanessa is finally divorcing you, and will still get 50% despite a prenup per California law. Hope all those affairs were worth it.


Beyonce': Another repeat list member. We're honestly happy you and Jay are finally having a child. But you all (and the media) acted as if it were a seismic event. Babies are born everyday Bey, you were on 9-4-81!


The U.S. Judicial system. You all really dropped the ball in 2011. From Casey Anthony to Troy Davis, this system just needs to be scrapped and reset from scratch.


Herman Cain: You are/were almost as bad of a candidate as Sarah Palin was.  9-9-9, c'mon man! The smartest thing you did was suspending your campaign.


DJ Khalid:  First off, I've grown to hate the "N" word. And you being Palestinian have absolutely NO business in using it. Your ethnicity is your business, but you act as if you're trying to be fake and/or down another race.


TNT, for canceling HawkthoRNe, and just when it was hitting its stride.  Apparently you guys do not know drama.


People that watch trashy, fake reality television such as all of these fake Housewive shows, American Idol, X Factor, and Jersey Shore, instead of quality programming such as Awkward Black Girl, Breaking Bad, Swamp People, Sons of Anarchy, Beavis and Butthead, Big Bang Theory, Mike and Molly, and The League.


Kim Kardashian: You know you didn't love Kris Humphries, you just wanted to outdo your sisters and apparently the Royal Wedding. A true example of someone wanting the wedding instead of the marriage.


Autocorrect: It's always getting folks in trouble, and making me look like a jackass.


College presidents: enough with the BCS already! We need a playoff in Division I college football


Chinese buffets: even if you have a hibachi bar, you can't hold a candle to your Japanese counterparts. The Chinese buffet craze has died down, its just gross now


Folks that joke on Amy Winehouse: Yes she did have alcohol in her system. But the deceased should be showed more respect. God rest her soul, she was sick and disturbed.


Sheree, Marlow, and Peter from RHOA. Y'all have officially stolen the drama queen and trouble making crowns from Nene and Phaedra. Congrats I guess are in order.


The Penn State scandal:  Joe Pa, c'mon man, you must have thought you were bigger than Jesus if you thought you could let that pass without repercussions.


FAMU Band Scandal: Hazing and sexual abuse has seemed to become very problematic in schools lately. But this takes the cake. That was just murder, literally.


Frankie (Keyshia Cole's mom). The Frankie Leg, really??? Didn't you think you were already a big enough coon on your TV show. You have officially out buffooned Fantasia and her "Cornbread and Collard Greens" dance.


WHEW!!! Happy New Year folks!


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Sunday, July 3, 2011

2011 Mid Year Cowbell List

The year is halfway over, and I'm back with my list of things thus far that lack major "cowbell". I would like to give a shoutout to my friend Regina Wright for inspiring and assisting with my bi-annual lists. Maybe one day we can get our own cowbell column.

Ok without further adieu:

- LeBron. You made that big spectacle on TV to leave for the Heat, then go to the championship and choke. You have got to control the women in your life better and deliver in clutch situations.

- Planking. It's out of control, idiotic, and folks that do it obviously do not know its historical origins. Who started this fad anyway?

- Ohio State football. Y'all are basically screwed for a while. You guys remind me of Miami or Alabama in the 90s. Looks like Michigan will be beating you for years to come now.

- Pittsburgh Steelers fans. Many of you were sore losers after my Packers beat you in the last Super Bowl. Some of you even questioned my loyalty thinking I was a bandwagoner. Anyone that knows me well knows I'm a longtime Green Bay fan.

- Sarah Palin. Please just keep your mouth shut, and stay out of the public eye. You will not get the GOP nod for the presidency, and you're lucky if you can even become president of the PTO at your child's school.

- Beyonce'. The first 2 singles off of your newest album, as well, as the videos, were well below par. B, you turn 30 this year, your heyday is wearing down, you can't afford a setback, especially now that you fired your father as manager.

- The NFL and NBA. Stop being greedy and just come to an agreement already so that America will not be deprived of its top 2 sports. You will lose waay more money if the lockouts or shortened seasons come.

- VH-1 for its continuously bad programming. Basketball Wives, Mob Wives, and now this mess of a show, Single Ladies.

- Tamar Braxton. You need to simply sit down and shut up. Behave.com! America is laughing at your ignorant, obnoxious self, not with you.

FB updates. They're getting worse. First its SNs, now its ridiculous hashtags, reposts, spam, voting contests, and now getting tagged to these horrendous looking shoes!

-Charlie Sheen. Dude you are definitely NOT #winning #thatisall

- Apple. You guys do not run the technology spector, so please get a reality check.

- Kevin Hart. Funny, yes. But you're no Chris Rock, Chapelle, Redd, Eddie, or Pryor. You are overrated in a comic industry lacking a dominant black comedian.

-Rihanna. You are just a mess, loving the way guys lie, into S&M, and now you're on speaking terms with Chris Brown once again.

- Wiz Khalifa. It appears the need for ignorant, coonish rappers is not stopping any time soon.

-Amber Rose. You are a very gorgeous woman, but please leave other women's men alone. Less @$$, more class, please and thank you.

Pirates of the Caribbean 4. One of the low points of the franchise, and this summer movie season. I'm not so hype for 5 now.

- Lace front wigs. They're getting out of hand! It appears for every black woman going natural, two are buying a week's worth of lace front wigs.

Lupe Fiasco. Dude, first you release the disappointing "Lasers", and now you make these brash statements about President Obama. Perhaps you should go into hiding for about 2 years.

- Folks that won't get pedicures but need them. They are relaxing, and almost necessary, especially if you love open toed shoes.

- Women wearing booty shorts with extreme cellulite. Yeah its really hot, but you should dress with discretion. Those clothes are a privilege and NOT a right!

- Text message language used on resumes. Really are you kidding me? And you folks are typically the first to complain about not being able to find a job.

- People that complain about not being able to find a good mate and when they actually do, do not know how to act or treat them.

Video stores. C'mon, stop trying to stay open! Redbox and Netflix are holding down the movie and game rental business. Even Blockbuster is now slowly transitioning to Redbox-like Kiosks. Get with the program!

- Marvin's Room It's an overrated, sad song, and lacks substance and cowbell.
- Ted Williams. The world was your oyster and you have tainted your 2nd chance. I pray that you finally get the help you need.
- The Royal Wedding. There's no reason Americans should make a fuss about it, and it's waay too expensive and unrealistic. Plus William and Kate are simply people, NOT the Sun and the Moon.

Happy 4th of July, enjoy the fireworks (uggghhh) and try to stay off my next list!
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